Pointless

Three weeks have passed, and the blog backlog builds up. I returned a week ago from a short but eventful trip to Indonesia. Since my return I have been to two concerts – Roger Waters and Eric Clapton. Now I have to write about all of these, and here I am still trying to finish writing about what I did in November.

Yes. I’m a bad bad blogger. Spank me.

I may be completely wrong, but I think the interest this blog generates has diminished of late. I get the feeling that not so many people visit anymore. Not that I care. I’m going to write stuff anyway, sporadically or otherwise. But I can’t help getting that feeling.

These recent vacations to Auckland and Jakarta involved some severe consumption of alcohol and food, surprisingly (for me), more food that alcohol. As a result, I am fat. I’ve had grand plans for some time now to magically lose all this weight and metamorph into a Bruce Lee-like body, complete with kung-fu skills and Cantonese accent. Alas, this is not easy. Apparently, it’s very very hard (read – impossible). So I’ve settled for a lesser goal - reasonably lean body minus accent and kung-fu skills. Apparently, even this is not easy. A wise man dressed as a fitness instructor told me it involves exercise and a healthy diet, and dedication and motivation.

Whodathot?!

Anyhoo, given my rather alarming lack of motivation to do anything, except watch TV while inclining horizontally, I don’t think I am going to lose any weight. What I need right now is some major stress at work, or maybe some emotional trauma. I hear this results in rapid weight loss.

Last night, during one of these horizontally-inclined-TV-binges, I thought I felt my creative juices flowing inside me. (I found out later it was a false alarm, and that it was just gas.) But between the thought and the burp, I came up with a short (I mean really REALLY short) story. I have included it here for your reading pleasure. You’re welcome.

Untitled Really Really Short Story

Once upon a time, there was a man.

He died.

BURP!

The End

I told you the post was pointless. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

I was going to title the post 'Untitled'. Then I decided to go with 'Untitled and Pointless', but realized that this is actually a title. So finally, it was just 'Pointless'. I write all this assuming you care a lot.

My next post will not be about what I did in November. It will be about buttocks. I'm sure you're tingling with anticipation.